How to Use Your Dad Bod to Get Out of Doing Chores

How to Use Your Dad Bod to Get Out of Doing Chores

Being a dad is a full-time job, and sometimes, you just need a break from the endless chores that keep piling up. But, let’s be honest—dads have developed a secret weapon over the years: the Dad Bod. Sure, it’s not just about rocking that comfortable, slightly doughy physique; it’s about using it to your advantage. You’ve earned the right to sit back, relax, and maybe "supervise" a little more than you actually "do." Here’s how to expertly leverage your Dad Bod to dodge some of those pesky chores.

1. The Classic “My Back’s Acting Up” Move

Step 1: Wait until the perfect moment—just as your partner or kids ask you to help lift something heavy, like moving a couch or rearranging the living room.

Step 2: Put your hand on your lower back, wince slightly, and say, “You know, my back’s been acting up lately…” (Bonus points if you throw in a dad grunt for added effect.)

Step 3: Sit back down, make yourself comfortable, and offer to "supervise." Congratulations! You’re now the official couch consultant.

Best T-Shirt to Wear: “Call of Doodie”—because you’re always ready for duty… as long as it doesn’t involve heavy lifting.

2. The "I'll Get to It Later" Stall Tactic

Every dad has mastered the art of procrastination. When asked to fix the leaky faucet or finally organize the garage, simply say, “Yeah, I’ll take care of it right after I finish this game/episode/nap.”

Step 1: Nod seriously and tell your partner or kids, “I’ll get to it, don’t worry.” Step 2: Wait approximately 48 hours, and when they ask again, respond with, “I’m still thinking about the best way to approach it. Gotta do it right, you know.”

If you’re lucky, by the time they remind you a third time, someone else may have already done it!

Best T-Shirt to Wear: “Shut Up and Take My Money”—perfect for when you might suggest just hiring someone else to do it instead.

3. The "Strategic Nap" Maneuver

Here’s the thing about Dad Bods—they come with a built-in ability to take naps anywhere. Use this to your advantage! When it’s time to mow the lawn, clean the gutters, or do something equally laborious, just find a nice spot on the couch and take a quick power nap.

Step 1: Wait until your partner mentions the task at hand. Step 2: Quietly disappear and curl up in a cozy corner of the house (the recliner is ideal), closing your eyes just enough to appear deep in sleep.

When they find you snoozing, there’s no way they’ll wake you up to do chores—no one interrupts a dad nap!

Best T-Shirt to Wear: “I’m Not Fat, I’m Just a Little Husky”—because, honestly, your body needs rest to handle all that huskiness.

4. The “Sympathy Belly” Excuse

The Dad Bod comes with one undeniable advantage—a soft, lovable belly that you can use for sympathy. When asked to clean out the garage or rake the leaves, gently pat your belly and say, “I don’t think this body is built for that kind of work anymore.”

Step 1: Smile and give your belly a light tap. Step 2: Maybe even throw in, “I’m better suited for jobs like… quality control on snacks.”

The charm of this excuse is that no one can argue with the undeniable truth of the Dad Bod’s physical limitations. Besides, who can resist the lovable dad belly?

Best T-Shirt to Wear: “I’m Super Rexxy”—because even though you’re dodging chores, you still look Rexxy while doing it.

5. The "Overdo It On Purpose" Technique

Here’s a genius move: when you do get stuck doing chores, make sure to overdo it in the most exaggerated way possible. For example, if you're asked to fold laundry, fold it so creatively wrong that your partner will never ask you again.

Step 1: Fold towels in triangles or roll them into shapes that resemble modern art. Step 2: When putting away dishes, "accidentally" mix up all the pots, pans, and Tupperware lids in the wrong cabinets.

After a few rounds of this, your family will figure out that it's just easier to do it themselves.

Best T-Shirt to Wear: “I’m a T-Wrecks”—because when you do get involved, let’s face it, things might get wrecked.

Conclusion

The Dad Bod is more than just a lifestyle—it’s a strategic advantage in avoiding household chores. Whether you’re perfecting your power nap, employing the sympathy belly, or dodging tasks with the classic “I’ll get to it later” line, your Dad Bod is your ultimate tool for relaxation.

So, next time the chores start piling up, remember: you’ve got this! And by “this,” we mean a comfy t-shirt, a soft couch, and the ability to avoid all heavy lifting with style and grace. At Dad Bod Streetwear, we’re here to make sure you look good while doing… well, as little as possible.

And that’s how you use your Dad Bod to stay chore-free! Now, kick back, relax, and let the t-shirts do the talking.